Boo Ya!

Halloween is near, and so is the spooky reminder, "You are not alone! Mwah ha ha haaa!"

Of course, I'm not alone. Even when I'm alone, I'm not alone.

And that's a good thing. Why? Because I want connection.

• I want to be seen; not just for who I am, but for who I can become. 
• I want to be heard; not just for the things I'm sure of, but for the thoughts in my heart trying to find expression. 
• I want to be understood; not just when I give clear reasons for the hope that is within me, but also in the times I'm not even sure what I mean. 
• I want to be known; not just that I exist, but for my purpose in life, why I exist at all.
• I want to be loved; not as the world loves, but for the nurturing of my spiritual growth.

Gee! Sounds like an awful lot of "I wants," doesn't it? Actually, there's nothing wrong with that, even if it does seem selfish. These are basic human needs. I want my needs met. Sound better that way?

However, life is ironic. I learned that going through life seeking to get those needs met is exactly the way to make sure they don't. Not only is it better to give than to receive, in this case, it's critical. 

In other words, to get what I want, I must want to graciously give and genuinely follow through.

• If I want to be seen, see others for their potential and be encouraging to them.
• If I want to be heard, listen with my heart to what others are really trying to express.
• If I want to be understood, seek first to fully understand and be sincerely interested.
• If I want to be known, discover what others highly value and hold dear to their hearts.
• If I want to be loved, be motivated by love to extend myself for the purpose of nurturing someone's else's spiritual growth.

Gee! Sounds wonderful, doesn't it? Actually, there is everything right about this list. These are not selfish at all. Connection is a basic human need. Connection is something I can only get by giving. 

So, I give you my happy thoughts at this spooky time of year to spread the joy, not of Halloween, but weaning off the feeling of being hollow. Feeling hollow and needy were one and the same for me.

My desire is to inspire. I'm putting a 180-degree spin on my own attitude in life and finding a key ingredient to living. So, when a costumed character eerily whispers low, "You are not alone," I will smile and respond, "You got that right!" I'm even here with you now as you read this. So, smile!

Early Once More

My quiet time to write gets slowly squeezed out as the sun rises. Yep! That's me, early to rise.

I'm not always early to bed, though, which makes rising with a clear head difficult sometimes. But, I find this time to be precious, so much so, I retire early so I can enjoy it.

I love the quiet of the morning. I love the gentleness of my thoughts before my soul gets mugged, once again, by everyday occurrences. My heart is closest to the surface and I'm free to be me.

I've revisited this ol' blog o' mine to revitalize and focus its contents on the gist of my thoughts: writing from the heart. I must do so. I hope you enjoy reading this blog. I wrote it for writers, specifically me.

"Early to bed, early to rise, makes the mundane seem like surprise." -- some blog writer ;-)

Change in My Bowls

I must write
    if I want to write, right?
I have the time to make the time
    even the time to rhyme.
So what keeps me from the task, I ask?

My heart should be on fire
    from my desire.
Instead, there's not a puff;
    the heat's just not enough.
If fashion were my passion
    I'd be at the mall, flashin'.
Instead, I creep
    through a heep
    of blank pages. (How cheap!)

I don't want what I wrote
    to sound lazy or rote.
Stale writing that's old
    grows moldy and cold.
Am I afraid
    of a sentence I've made?
Why is it worse
    to hear my own verse?
It's absurd
    that I'd be afraid of a word!
Especially my own
    does it make me groan?

Besides, it doesn't matter a smatter.

There are no souls
    to put change in my bowls.
I hide in my room
    warm, close, like a womb.

I write for me, you see, and also for God.

Are you even there?
    Should I even care?
Yes! No! Nonsense! Beware!
I'm alone with a bone of my own.
    to pick, lick or stick it and moan.
I fight me, God heals me
   I jab at Him and He sets me free.

So comment
    if you wish, on my lament.
Maybe I'll read it someday
    if I wish. Okay!

For now, it's write that I write right now.
Until His words and mine do mesh,
    and my phrases take on life that's fresh.

Job Market -v- Food Market

When I go to something called a food market, I see plenty of one of my favorite foods: fruits. I love berries, peaches, and melons, for example. If I hear of a new food market opening up, I expect it would have those same things and probably more, and at competitive prices, too.

On the other hand, when I search through the job market I have a very hard time finding what I want, especially at the salary I want. I wonder if my ideal job is even there at all! Do I have to modify what I want? Do I have to be the best conformer? Occasionally, I'll find something vaguely similar to the position I seek, but the location or salary is outside my desired range.

My experience is like finding bruises on all the peaches. I wonder what the inside looks like if I can see a bruise on the outside. Likewise, the job market is full of things I don't want. It's like the ultimate package offered on satellite TV: hundreds of channels you don't want. I can go to another nearby food market, but I can't go to another nearby job market. If I wanted, I could relocate for a job, which is what I'd have to do if I wanted another cable provider. But what if I want to stay?

I think the "job market" needs to be renamed. From my perspective, it's not a market at all! It's more like a network of channels, most of which I really don't want. Networking is the greatest tool in finding an appropriate position. It's not like I can breeze through the 'want ads' and see plenty of one of my favorite jobs. I have to surf the channels, test the networks, and become part of the network. There are few TV channels that I really enjoy.

It's only a market when employers go shopping. They pick from the selection of available stock and offer a competitive price. It's my job to be a juicy-looking peach. How humiliating! This is the reason I'd rather be self-employed, or at least avoid corporations that place the worship of profits before the serving of people. Sorry pal, I'm not a peach. I'd rather network or broadcast. After all, it's about people - relating to them, getting to know them, letting them know me, and serving them. The opportunity is out there, shopping. Let it find me. Leave the market for food or some other abundance of selection.

The Complete Idiot's Guide for Dummies

I love these books. I have several 'Complete Idiot's Guides' and 'for Dummies' books related to business and some other topics, even philosophy. I started this blog with the idea that I would list a few comical titles that I'd like to see. But, after a little research, I think some the actual titles are funnier than I imagined. I merely imagined the comment that follows. Check these out:

The Complete Idiot's Guide to Improving Your IQ
Would the appropriate audience understand why they need this book?

The Complete Idiot's Guide to Dealing with Difficult Employees
Any chance these 'difficult employees' are complete idiots?

The Complete Idiot's Guide to Understanding Intelligent Design
OK. The scholars are giving us a hard time. Who else can we target?

The Complete Idiot's Guide to Understanding the Brain
Required Prerequisite: The CIG to Improving Your IQ.

The Complete Idiot's Guide to Pleasing Your Woman
Really now. Is this even possible? Or...
Must be fiction; it's too short a book.

The Complete Idiot's Guide to Pleasing Your Man
All you really need is the cheat-sheet inside the front cover.

The Complete Idiot's Guide to Tae Kwon Do
Oh great! Now he'll be Completely Dangerous, too!

Snort for Dummies
It' snot what you're thinking.

Pregnancy for Dummies
Doh! Should have read 'Contraceptives for Dummies' first.

Charcoal Companion Grilling Burgers for Dummies Book/Flipper Set
Bad marketing. Husbands won't read it. (What man needs instructions on grilling?) And the last thing they want is criticism from an informed wife about this manly-man task.

World History for Dummies
This should be required reading for those entering politics. Obviously, it isn't. (Ouch!)

Chemistry for Dummies
No thanks. I'm waiting for the actual 'Chemistry Set for Dummies'.

Cable & Satellite Wiring Kit For Dummies
Gee! After this, I'll upgrade my household current to 200 amps!

Stretching For Dummies
This is dumb. Anything is a stretch for dummies!

Infertility For Dummies
Isn't this a good thing?

Religion For Dummies
Uh, no. Bad idea.

Spirituality For Dummies
Much better.

Dating For Dummies, 2nd Edition
Now I feel better. The author didn't get it right the first time either.

Sex For Dummies, 3rd Edition
Really? It took 3 editions to get this right?

Now it's my turn. Here are some titles I'd like to see:

• The Complete Idiot's Guide to Reading a Good Book Instead
• The Complete Idiot's Guide to Using Your Turn Signal While Driving
• The Complete Idiot's Guide to Knowing When They Are Making Fun of You
• Not Being President of the United States for Dummies
• Car Crash Test Jobs for Dummies
• txt msg'g 4 dumez

Enjoy reading (something else)!

"Listen to your gut!"

I've heard it before. When it comes time to make a tough, long lasting decision, with potentially dire consequences, the gut knows best. But, why is that supposed to be good advice? What wisdom is in my gut that supersedes that which (I humbly presume) is in my head? What is my gut? (I glance down at my lower chest, then my belly-button. I'm not impressed.) How and when does my gut speak to me? Surely, those who would offer the sage insight must be implying more than just the random gurgling and growling sounds of churning air that accompany hunger in an otherwise quiet room. I don't "get" what I should listen for, yet...

I do, however, feel my gut. When I am aware of them, I notice that my stomach muscles are very sensitive and respond to stress by tightening up. (Ironically, when I am aware of these muscles, I also realize how seldom I experience this awareness.) Health nuts suggest I breathe from my stomach muscles, like an infant would, and not from my chest. This often takes conscious effort on my part. (What an oxymoron - it takes effort to relax!) However, it's not enough to change my breathing pattern as I become aware of it. I must understand why the pattern changed to begin with.

My tendency is to breathe from my chest, and not my stomach, when I am feeling any stress. I'm feeling stress when I'm excessively relying on my thinking - when my brain is overwhelmed with information, questions, or contradictions. Listening to my gut is rather a matter of becoming aware of my gut's reaction to stress. Once I have the awareness that my gut feels tight, I can ask myself why.

I frequently perceive that this world is spinning faster than I was created to process. A tight gut indicates that I am responding to real stress. I can't just use my awareness to change my breathing pattern because the moment I become unaware my gut tightens up again. The operative word is reaction. My gut is not thinking and speaking on its own. It's reacting to stress signals from my brain. I must change my thinking.

The first step is to slow down. Only then can I attempt to simplify the complex, organize the chaotic, rationalize the illogical, and pursue a topic with a healthy curiosity. The next step is to follow through. Process the stressor. Muscles have memory. That's why musicians can improve with practice. It's also why my gut tightens again if I am reminded of an unresolved stressor. The reaction is automatic unless one of two things change: 1) either the reaction is retrained (which is really impossible: it just moves the reaction elsewhere in my body), or 2) the stressor is resolved and ceases to cause the reaction.

How do we process the stressors in our lives? By being truthful about them. So many bad habits and discomforts are tolerated because they seem less painful than the truth. In fact, we often bury the truth with busy-ness or surrender. "I like this job; it keeps me busy." "That's just the way I am." The absolute truth is that we are lonely, discontent, impatient, angry, etc.

The problem is that this world does not offer a safe haven to express the truth. It robs us of our chance to truly come alive. We must transcend the world. How? We can't propel ourselves into a safe haven. Counseling may help temporarily. But, in reality, we're stuck in the muck and mire of what's familiar and natural for us. We must be completely drawn out of it and given a new nature. Life itself is the reward. We only need to let ourselves be drawn. There is Someone who loves us and wants to give us that life. Why do we so arrogantly resist His advances and stubbornly cling to our gravestones? Why don't we listen to our guts?

John 8:32 and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free." (ESV)

Writing, for sure

How do I know when my writing is done?
Is it meant to be work, or meant to be fun?

I love to write, when I do I feel free,
Exposing my thoughts for all to see.

It just isn’t work, it’s more like play,
Like hopping and skipping with what I say.

What about poetry with its rhythm and rhyme?
It can change my emotion if I give it some time.

Writing is fun and it makes me happy,
Even if rhymes are weak and crappy.

When I’m not writing I’ll venture to read.
Books sprout with ideas that start from a seed.

I’ve learned not to judge a book by its size,
I won’t know ‘til I read it if it’s useful or wise.

I watch my own seeds grow into a plant.
Knowing I can and not saying, “I can’t.”

With TLC my plant will mature.
It’ll grow handsome and tall, that’s for sure.

==================================

Imagination is more important than knowledge. - Albert Einstein

Ask the right question

What does God want me to do? This is a huge question for me. I want to be sure I'm not hearing my earthly father's voice in the back of my head.

He was a diver and a diving coach. I was his student. I didn't know if I wanted to be. He gave me little choice. He was a business owner. In that regard, he left me alone. He didn't teach me about being in business. I've struggled in life on two fronts.

The mixed message I got from him was that I could be a good student if I disciplined myself to perform drills and listened to the experts. But, I could not be a good leader because someone else would always be better than me. As a result, I often gave up before I tried, or if I get too far ahead.

What does God say? Die to my sinful nature and live in Christ. Seek first the kingdom of God and all these things will be added to you. I can do all things in Christ who strengthens me. Pray without ceasing. And so on. I must live by the Spirit until it becomes natural to live by my spiritual nature.

How is that freeing? Does it simply repeat the pattern with which I struggle?

I think I want to succeed, in a worldly sense, so that I don't have financial worries. I would have freedom with my time, and so contribute to the advancement of His kingdom on earth by the riches of my wealth.

Oddly, however, it is not the prosperous man I admire. I may envy him for a duration, but I always get back to my heart. I admire the starving artist, the rebel who chased his passion despite the opposition and distractions in his midst.

Jesus humbled Himself as a man, becoming obedient even to death on a cross because His passion was to do His Father's will. His Father was different than my father. He didn't seek worldly wisdom, riches, or even approval.

Perhaps my question should be, do I want what He wants? Who knows? Maybe my idea of success falls far short of what He has planned for my life. I want this. I want purpose, direction, focus, and passion. His will is in His word, Scripture, not the business or self-help section of an online book store. If I want adventure, I can follow the unknown and trust He has only the best in store for me. But, am I willing to love Him? Do I have to give up being me? Who am I anyway? Whose am I?

No one can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and Money. (Matthew 6:24)

A Blog and An Escape!

Hi, I'm Mr2Happy!

What did you think when you read that name? It was a nickname given me a long time ago, pre-social media if you can believe it, for use in a chat-room. I used the nickname elsewhere. It stuck.

Someone once asked me, "Is it possible to be too happy?" I smiled inside. I liked the idea that it raised this question. I decided to expand the use of that name for other things, like this blog.

I've become aware of my appreciation for alternate or variable meanings. I love allegories and parables, for example. What comes to your mind when I mention the word "killed" in the same sentence as "murdered"? Yet, the word "killed" is mere jest when used in the phrase, "killed time."

I love a puns and a poetic play on words. Mozart's opera The Magic Flute is a cute romantic comedy on the surface. Yet, underneath it's full of deep, Masonic symbolism. I think parables are timeless. I love stories and story telling, just so long as they have a deeper, more profound meaning than what appears superficially.

I could go on -and I will- but not now. So, who is Mr2Happy? He's my ego and my alter-ego. He's fleshy, yet emotional. He's selfishly extroverted and generously introverted. In short, he's an escape for all that is in my heart, mind, and soul. It is the intention of my heart to discern my innermost thoughts, my Mr2Happy Thoughts.

By the way, I will occasionally insert quips and quotes of profound wisdom or cute jokes. Here's my first serious entry: "For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart." (Heb 4:12, ESV)